Category Archives: Uncategorized

Three feet. Ten feet tops. That’s about the length it feels. It is a strange thing to explain. How does one explain the length between yourself and well….yourself? But that is about the distance between the experiences.  Three to ten. It’s like a movie. Yes. A movie.  I watch this movie (to be fair its […]

​Posting this to remember and for my fellow warriors, educators. I sent this email. I am XXX out all information that would identify the humans behind it. Not because people like this deserve kindness, but because there is an innocent and really awesome child who is the real victim behind it. XXX, I never intended […]

I’m not envious of my peers. Hell no. I say a little prayer every morning.  Thank you God for not having me in my old job at this time. Truly I thank you. AMEN! I think that would put me over the edge! Yep. I would definitely be going crazy licking glue in the Kindergarten […]

But I get the accusation. “Look now Jacob is just like every other kid! No school for them either!” “ Jacob will be as disadvantaged as other kids this fall.” “No summer camp envy now! None of our kids are going” “Other kids will also be behind in language so entering Avenues won’t be as […]

I had a day without anxiety. I did! I had a whole day! All it took was a coast guard rescue.  Yes, a real coast guard rescue. And instead of anxiety, I was filled with laughter. Oddly this was hysterical to me as we slowly sank into the sea. We had a bit of an […]

Yesterday Benno turned 9. Last year his birthday was at NYU hospital. There were no presents from his parents. There was no party with friends. There was just family and an attempt to smile through it all. Jacob had just been diagnosed days before. The hospital staff allowed us to go outside on a balcony […]

Therapy it is. I’m not not a fan of therapy, I do believe it has merit and have seen results in the past, but I hate the long haul of it. I always like the quickest way out. I would rather the extreme and quick method. Can I just take some ayahuasca, live on a […]

Here I am back exactly where I started.  It is pretty frustrating. Scartch that it is infuriating.  I left my last job to make an impact. To solve a real problem for students in real need. And after a year like the last one, one would think I would have learned or at least have […]

Its a year today.  Maybe its an anniversary for you too. Maybe Jacob was the first sign of the cracking of the world around us. It does seem (from this perspective) that all the chaos sped into warp speed since his diagnosis. It may have been the first child you knew to have cancer. Maybe […]

Things are better.  Its true naming something does help. Knowing that I wasn’t going crazy was helpful and thank you Nightwing for helping with resources, articles, and even your own stories of the “anniversary effect.”. The weight is much lighter.  And I wrote this last night to remember its truth. That sometimes you have to […]