I turned off the music.

 I didn’t realize it.

It wasn’t on purpose. I just stopped listening. I shut out all the sounds. 

Depression turns out to be silent. A white noise that mutes the world.

And that was a mistake. A research fact mistake.

More than 400 years ago, William Shakespeare said that “music can raze out the written troubles of the brain” and today science studies have proven that to be true. Patients who listen to music recover faster from surgery than those who don’t. Music lights up the brain in the same ways of sugar and other pleasures. An experience that can change moods and perspectives in an array of chords. 

Music is found in every civilization in the world. There is not a society without music. It isn’t just entertainment, it is a vibration that effect’s the brain. It is medicine. It can heal. And civilizations older than 400 years ago knew this too.

But it got turned off.

I turned off the music and with it I lost perspective and even myself.

Without music, I had no beat to march my feet to. It is hard to put one foot in front of the other and see the day when you can’t hear the sound of your own feet. I was left with silence and turns out silence is still. 

Music has always played a large role in my life.

I can recall songs from periods of life. Middle School? Reality Bites soundtrack (over and over). High school? the Indigo Girls, Tori Amos (all those ladies) and, of course, the prerequisite dose of Dave Matthews Band. And even as an adult I can think of songs that define moments in my adult history. 

The most obvious being our wedding. Steve and I got married to “Bridge Over Troubled Water.” An appropriate song for so many reasons. Steve and I both swam in some stormy water before finding land with each other. And to just nail that metaphor home, we even got married on a bridge over water! 

And you can imagine how that can only end:

And many followed. How can you not?!

And that song feels appropriate yet again. 

So in the words of Simon and Garfunkel

Sail on silver girl

Sail on by

Your time has come to shine

All your dreams are on their way

See how they shine

Oh, if you need a friend

I’m sailing right behind

Like a bridge over troubled water

I will ease your mind

Like a bridge over troubled water

I will ease your mind

Turns out I have one thing I can do to take control.

Music, come ease my mind.

I can even pump up the volume!

to level 11!